


hard reset

by runimpossiblegirl



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dry Humping, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Finnrose Mentions, Fluff and Angst, Han Solo Dies, Kinesiologist Rey, Lawyer Ben Solo, Not Ben tho, POV Multiple, Parents Han and Leia, Penis In Vagina Sex, Physical Therapy, Rating May Change, Star Wars places as countries, They are soft your honor, Wet Dream, canon character death, stroke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:54:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25364935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runimpossiblegirl/pseuds/runimpossiblegirl
Summary: When Han suffers a stroke Ben finally abandons the job his parents hate and comes home. His disfunctional family gets a forced hard reset and the path to recovery —managed by a very determined Rey— will be bumpy, bittersweet, but mostly full of love.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 11
Kudos: 65





	1. Chapter 1

It’s Monday, the busiest day of the week for the team of the clinic and Rey is excited to meet the new patients she’ll get to know and see through their physical rehabilitation. She never imagined that losing her parents at an early age –a car accident as a product of intoxication, she has never gotten in a car with a driver that’s not completely sober since then— would put her on the path of Maz Kanata.

Her beloved Maz was already old when she was six, but she can’t imagine a more energetic mother for a very serious child. She had been on the hospital when Rey arrived, and seeing nobody running behind her made her stay, just in case, and she had ended up never leaving her side again. Even when she was scared or angry Maz never got mad. She would wait for the storm to pass and then hug her and promise that everything was going to be ok.

When she was fourteen, Maz started developing a tremor on her hands that made the tea cups shake and the needing needles hard to use. They went to a doctor and after some exams she was diagnosed with Parkinson disease. The nightmares of her childhood –of being completely alone in the world, walking down empty streets, crying for someone to _come back_ — returned with a vengeance, but Maz told her they were only afraid because they didn’t know what did that words meant exactly, but that scary things tend to lose their scariness when you actually know them. Maz told her that rule worked on people, too.

That gave Rey a purpose, and hours on the library translated in a mountain of information. She learned that Parkinson was a neuromuscular disease that affected a lot of people in the world. That some people presented symptoms at a very early age, and that they learned to live with that. Their doctor gave her some meds that would make the tremors diminish, but could also make her a little more slow or nauseous. He also send Maz to a physical therapist, as the best way to slow the movement loss –just slow, as a degenerative affliction cannot be stopped— was to move.

Three days a week Maz and Rey would go to a small clinic the doctor had recommended and spent two hours, one with the physio and one with the occupational therapist, doing exercises and making new friends. Some of them arrived in serious conditions that scared her, but as the days passed she started to note how everyone improved. It was magical to see that. That’s how a very determined Rey fell in love with physical therapy.

In their time as patients they learned several techniques for the bad days, those when walking or even talking could get hard, and to these days Maz was still participating in a once a week group meeting of people with Parkinson, they called themselves an _unshakeable_ unit. She wasn’t afraid anymore, and Rey liked to think that it was in big part because of all of the study she had done.

It was easy to choose Kinesiology as a career once she finished high school. Working on Alderaan, a country where its politicians actually cared about people, saw rehabilitation as an important pillar of health and injected founds to public services meant she never had to turn down someone and could afford to live in a nice place and help her mother.

Monday was not just the busiest but also her favorite day of the week.

✨

Leia Organa can’t say she has always done thing right. She knows that when she was young and just getting into politics she supported bills without reading them completely that somehow ended opposing to her ideals and setting her back with the public. She knows she fights with her husband more than he deserves, that he started staying behind even in the first days of their marriage, a key time to learn how to communicate with actual words that they skyped in favor of frantic physical reencounters a few times a month. She knows overall that she should have given so much more of her time to her son, who only got more shy and resentful with every public event he was forced to attend even when mom and dad hadn’t eaten a single meal with him in ten days.

She carries a lot of mistakes, but she doesn’t think she deserved to receive the news of her husband having a stroke while he was flying his plane in the middle of a perfect summer morning. She remembers how the world seemed to stop and her hands lost her strength to hold on to anything. Everything was white noise until she could hear her assistant say, “Senator, he managed to land and is being transferred to the Capital’s hospital. A car is already waiting for you. Do you need me to call someone?”

She snapped out of it only with that final question. “Ben, I need Ben.”

They hadn’t talked with their only son in more than five years. Not because a lack of trying but because he never answered their calls. It was probably only the fact that the new office number was private that made him respond. Four hours later he was taking a plane to leave Mustafar. Ten more and he was hugging her for the first time in forever.

It was everything Leia had wanted but it hurt so much that Han was fighting for his life in a room somewhere on this building, and that this man that towered over her and was keeping her up while she finally fell apart had so little of the boy she loved and remembered left on him.

But Han was a fighter – _never tell me the odds, Princess_ — and now, six months later they were starting his non acute physical rehab.

It was Monday and her husband was not in a good mood, but Ben only had drank his coffee in silence while Han mumbled, and once he was done he put his mug on the sink and just strong armed his father into the car.

“I did not moved my life back to this country to hear you complain every day, old man. Doctor Holdo recommended this place and you will go, because mom says you have to.”

“So now’s important what your mom says so. But five years ago…” His words were a bit slurred but a lot better than at the beginning, when he would get frustrated when they couldn’t understand him.

“It’s only important when it’s about you. Also, you weren’t even there five years ago.”

Leia clears her throat on the backseat. “I think we are ready, we should go if we want to make it there in time.”

“You heard the princess,” mumbles Han. And then a softer, “I’m sorry, kid.”

“I know, dad. Just try not to be this _charming_ with the people on the clinic,” says Ben before driving away from the house.

Leia echoes that. And Han just looks out of the window.

✨

Their clinic has a small office for Rey, a big open gym with all the gadgets needed to get people the motor reeducation they need –stairs with security bars at the sides and steps big and small, three boxes with stretchers and infrared lights in them, electrotherapy equipment, a hot compress container, parallel bars, physio balls in all the sizes, several static bikes, a treadmill, upper body strength machines, a wooden structure nailed to the wall to help as standing support, mats, and several other small things Rey uses in creative ways— a desk for Kaydel to receive the patients, a waiting room that allows the companions to watch over their family members every moment, a room adapted for Jannah to work with children on voice treatment, another for Rose to treat the adults with deglutition and talking alterations and a complete tiny house like space for Finn to work on the occupational part of the rehabilitation process.

They are a good team, a little family _in a non—ugly corporate way_ , and they get a lot of referrals from neurologist that know of their work. They treat every patient as a single unit, sharing notes and researching new therapies that could be useful. Their clinic is Rey’s second favorite place in the word. The first its Maz’s house, of course.

When she arrives that day everyone is already there, having breakfast on the table they keep for manual activities.

“There she is!” exclaims Finn. “We were getting worried and just about to eat the chocolate covered donut.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” says Rey, menacingly. They all know the chocolate donuts they sell on Takodana’s are her favorite. Takodana’s belongs to Maz, and eclectic place that sells baked goods on the mornings, delicious lunch at noon and good alcohol past 5 pm. A city landmark that has been standing on the same place for more than thirty years. 

“Of course we wouldn’t,” says Jannah, always the pacifier.

“Did you have a busy weekend? Is that why you weren’t the first one here today?” asks Rose, moving her eyebrows in a suggestive way.

“No, do not answer that! We have talked about this, people!” That’s Finn again. They have traumatized him more than they should by now. Probably.

Rey blushes. “Of course not, you know I said I’d like to take a time for myself after Beaumont.”

“Ugh, Beaumont more like Ewwmont. He was an asshole, yes, but not everyone is going to be like that,” Kaydel adds while the rest of the group nods.

“Since when did breakfast became Rey’s inquisition time? I’m closing this discussion until further notice and eating my donut. People is going to start arriving soon.”

They laugh at her weak attempt to distract them –she knows they will probably start pestering her about the dating thing again at lunch— but they end up their breakfast and move their things to the tiny kitchen they keep clean and stocked, just in case some of their patients need something.

The clock it’s about to hit 8.30 so Rey rushes to brush her teeth. Once she’s out of the bathroom she sees a big guy talking to Kaydel, the sun is hitting the windows just behind him so he’s more of a dark shape that anything, a shape that’s seems to be trying to make himself smaller by hunching his shoulders. She’s sure he’s not a patient and when she looks to the sitting room can see a regal looking woman and a man in a wheelchair that clearly doesn’t want to be here. _Oh, he’s one of those._ Good thing she has never not eventually won the affection of her patients.

She starts walking towards the desk with her best smile, the one that shows her dimples.

“Hello,” she says happily.

The man –Oh, god, the man. He’s not a shape, he’s a tall marble figure you would expect to find only on a museum, with a strong nose, dark soft eyes, a perfect curtain of luscious hair, a cluster of moles spread on his face, a wide and full mouth, strong shoulders and _she needs to stop looking down because it is certainly not professional_ — turns around and then the corner of his mouth rises. _Oh. God. The man_.

“Um, hello,” he says with the most delicious voice she has ever listened to. And she listen to any podcast with Jon Hamm as a guest. “You must be Rey,” his smile seems to only be pushing for a full scape when he says, “I’m sorry, but there’s some chocolate,” his right hand rises and brushes the corner of her mouth, “—there.”

He realizes what he did a second later and blushes furiously. And Rey can feel her face heat in tandem. “I’m so sorry,” they say at the same time, and she can feel Kaydel’s and the two other visitors attention on them. “Yes, I’m Rey, the kinesiologist.”

“This is Ben Solo,” Kaydel offers, breaking the tension. “His dad, Han Solo over there, is our new patient. He was just released from his acute therapy post stroke and it’s ready to start phase two with us.”

Even with the big distraction standing next to her, her attention immediately goes to Han, and she approaches him offering her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, mister Solo. I’m sure after six months you are a little done with all the fussing but I can promise you that’s not something we do here.”

“Huh, just Han will do,” says Han, looking at her and shaking her hand with a little bit of trouble. “And we’ll see.”

“And who is you pretty companion?” she asks.

“I’m Leia, dear. I can already see why Amilyn recommended you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Leia. Wait, Leia as in Organa? The Senator? And Luke Skywalker’s sister?”

“Yes, that’s me. But how do you know Luke?”

“Oh, I met him a long time ago. When my mom used to go to her physical therapy he was getting training with his new arm prosthetic. Quite the character, that mister Skywalker.”

She can hear Ben’s huff behind her at the same time Leia answers, “That’s certainly my brother.”

“Wait. Who’s your mom, kid?” asks Han.

“I doubt you know her, her name’s Maz Kanata.”

“Of course I know Maz,” Han has some problems with the R’s, something to mention Rose later. “She owned that bar downtown your minions found me in with Lando when you went into labor, sweetheart.”

“HAN SOLO YOU WERE IN A BAR WHEN I WAS IN LABOR?!” Rey almost jumps at that. Such a big voice for such a tiny woman.

“Oh, shit, I forgot you didn’t knew that.”

“Oh god,” that’s Ben. “Guys, this is really not the time for the walk down drunk memory lane.”

“You are right, of course. But this is not over, Solo. Now you owe me, and I’m cashing right now. You cannot stop your therapy.”

Resignation projects from Han’s frame. “Ok, Princess. Whatever you say.”

“I can’t believe I moved myself back for this.”

It’s the last thing Rey hears Ben say before offering him a smile and taking his father to an examination box with Leia. When she passes the desk she can see Kaydel’s smirk. _Oh, she’s going to get so much shit at lunch_.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She’d been right that day and Kaydel had been happy to recount with a luxury of details her first meeting with the Solos, including her dirty face, the way she had looked at Ben –and he had looked at her, apparently— and how she hadn’t stopped smiling the whole morning after it.
> 
> “They were just nice!”
> 
> “His ass was nice you mean”
> 
> “Kaydel! I cannot believe you’d think me that unprofessional. I can appreciate a well-honed body, muscles are my area of expertise,” her tone full of dignity couldn’t cheat anyone.

Ben didn’t have too many fond memories from his childhood. Objectively, he knows his parents loved him, but as a lonely child whose company used to be only the service members of the house that wasn’t so easy to see.

For example, his birthdays were a big event every year, but they were always full of grownups fighting for the attention of her very important mother and very dashing father. At the end of the day his favorite part was the singing of happy birthday because the rest of the kids couldn’t brother him about his ears anymore and he knew that at least in that moment mom and dad would be standing beside him, ready for the cameras. But the next morning was mostly him and the butler Cecile —Cee, as he was allowed to call him— with his British accent and worried eyes, telling him there had been a really important call and he was alone this morning but at least could eat all the cake he wanted.

At thirteen he asked to stop the parties. His parents didn’t understood but didn’t really have the time to make a fuss about it. One time in Mustafar, absolutely smashed, he had told that story to the girlfriend of the moment and all she had said was, “The poor rich boy act doesn’t suit you, love.”

He broke up with her two weeks later and never tried to discuss his memories with another person again.

Of course, his childhood was nothing compared to the antagonism he developed with his family during college. His mother had wanted for him to go into something more politically related, so he could work with her in the future. His father agreed with Leia if they managed to be in the same room while his career choice had been discussed, but Ben had no interest in following her mother righteous steps and ignored their advice. He’d wanted to go to law school, and follow the steps of the disgraced side of his family. The grandfather who had never lost on court, not even in the case of Senator Palpatine where all the evidence was against him. It had won him no love from the people of Alderaan but discovering the story and folded newspapers in a forgotten drawer had attracted a lot of admiration from Ben.

But Leia’s disappointment in his career —if very vocal— was nothing compared to the political alliances he formed. During his first internship in First Order Holdings he had attracted the attention of mister Snoke, a lobbyist for every project his mother opposed in congress, and he had taken pleasure on helping develop strategies so she lost as often as possible.

It wasn’t even that he agreed with stuff like limitation of liberty, discrimination, rent abuse and uncontrolled nature exploitation _between other nasty things_. It was only his chosen way of rebellion. His way to tell her _you cared so much about others that made me unable to care_ _about anyone_.

He wasn’t stupid and was not going to pretend not to know what Snoke's company was doing. But the man had approached him in his most vulnerable time, when his support system was nonexistent and all he carried with him was a mountain of disappointment. The problem was that when he couldn’t take that environment anymore, when his skin started to crawl with the thought of going to the office, he had already spent all of the years he should have been networking with the same man, and Snoke wasn’t going to let his best asset go. Not without ruining his possibilities in any other place.

So he had stayed. And then moved to a whole other country. And even when he missed his parents he stopped answering their calls and shoot down their attempts to reconnect. His last memory of his mom —from five whole years ago— was of a yelling match with her and Uncle Luke on the library of the house.

“Ben you need to get away from that man, he’s just using you and won’t have any problem with setting you aside later!”

“He’s not a politician, mom. I’ve seen how _they_ use people and he isn’t doing that,” he almost felt guilty for Leia’s flinch after that statement.

“Listen to your mother, kid! That coward will crush your soul.”

“And since when do you all give _a shit_ about my soul?!”

“Do not talk to your uncle like that! He’s not the monster we are discussing,” at that it was him who flinched.

“ _A monster_. You know what? I’m done with this and all of you. Done!”

He could hear his mother yell, “Ben, that wasn’t what you think!” But he was already storming out, not even saying goodbye to Cee.

Now it was too late to return to them. Or that’s what he thought until the day and unknown caller had ringed his phone and turned his world around 180°. His father had had a stroke _while flying his plane_ and his mother needed him, _could he come?_

He had walked as in a trance to Snoke's office and asked a leave of absence. He had laughed in his face and said no. And Ben had looked at him, old and weak and rotten, nodded and abandoned the building anyway. Less than a day later he was hugging his mother, watching her fall apart in a hospital hallway, followed by a bunch of _I’m sorry_ and _Its ok_ from both of them _._ They would have time to talk later. In that moment focusing their energy on Han was more important.

✨

Things were hard at the beginning. He had pulled through because if there was one thing Han Solo could do it was survive against the worst odds. But he was angry with every living and death thing in the world.

At the beginning it was that half his body has been flaccid, unable to support any of his weight, and had needed from Ben, Leia, Cee, Luke and Lando to do even the most menial task. He couldn’t eat on his own, couldn’t turn around on his bed, couldn’t go to the bathroom, and couldn’t even talk because nobody fucking understood him. It was not a life Han Solo wanted to live, not when he was the happiest when he could hug his wife, ruffle his son’s hair —even if he hadn’t done that since he was a teenager— and fly his plane.

Then it had been the spasticity, a rigidness on his muscles that made every joint cement solid, his body a wooden board because of an overload of returning signals to his brain. 

His son was the only good thing that had come from this disaster. He was finally back and Han could try to make things better, even if the Solo blood had made Ben even a bigger idiot that Han had ever been. He blamed the Skywalker branch for that. Overly dramatic that bunch. Luke had actually _lost a limb_ because of an honor duel with a sword while drunk.

On the very bad days he would not eat — _I’m not a fucking child, Leia, if I wanted to eat I would do it_ — and just curse his luck that he hadn’t crushed the fucking plane. But then he’d see Leia’s tears and immediately regret it. Surprisingly, it would always be Ben the one to drag him out of those states.

“So we are feeling pity for ourselves, uh? You want some company? Everyone’s always saying misery loves that.”

“So you finally acknowledge you were miserable. And all it took was for me to almost die, if I had known that I would have done it ten years ago, kid.”

“It’s not funny, old man. And yes, I was miserable, but at the beginning Mustafar didn’t feel that much different than here,” he had said without looking at him.

“I know it’s a shitty excuse but I stayed away not because I didn’t love you, but because I was afraid. I didn’t have a father to learn how to do it and thought I would only mess you up. It seemed like every time I was away for a while I would return and you’d be bigger and doing great, so I just… kept doing it. I know it’s not worth much now but if you need something I would rather you ask me than a creepy bastard on the street.”

“Mmmh,” was his son uncommitted answer, but after a minute he had mumbled he was hungry and _did he wanted to go to the kitchen with him_? And they had gone to the kitchen to find Leia cooking —a sight to behold certainly— and eaten in silence, but with a shaky new found balance.

The good days were those in which they saw an improvement. The first time he managed to sit himself without help, the day his arm finally loosed a bit. When he learned to move from the bed to the wheelchair and finally recovered some of his independency. And the day he could stand up again. Yes, he was sweating like a pig but back on his own two feet.

He was already used to his therapist when he was told he now needed to start with a new team that would focus on other skills. He hadn’t be happy at that and had spent weeks pushing his case with his family to just get the other physio to go to their house —he even thought they were going to accept if only to stop his constant whining— when he had opened his mouth and revealed that he’d been drunk on a bar with Lando the day his wife went into labor.

_Amateur move, Solo, you are getting old_.

So now that option was out and he would have to work with this new girl. Based on the bright red color on his son face during that first meeting it seemed he would at least get to have some fun.

✨

She’d been right that day and Kaydel had been happy to recount with a luxury of details her first meeting with the Solos, including her dirty face, the way she had looked at Ben —and he had looked at her, apparently— and how she hadn’t stopped smiling the whole morning after it.

“They were just nice!”

“His ass was nice you mean.”

“Kaydel! I cannot believe you’d think me that unprofessional. I can appreciate a well-honed body, muscles are my area of expertise,” her tone full of dignity couldn’t cheat anyone. “Rose, you were with them, too. Didn’t you find them charming?”

“Umm, not particularly? I mean, Leia was nice but mister Solo clearly didn’t want to be here and when I walked them out the son just sort of glared me intensely.”

“I think he’s just worried about his dad. It’s nice he didn’t let them alone in this situation,” finished Rey.

They had made fun of her the full hour, but she didn’t really mind it. Han Solo’s evaluation had gone quite well, they would have to start working in the strength of his core and lower train, the opening of his hand and balance, so he’d be coming Tuesdays and Fridays. She has also recommended he worked with Finn as that would help him feel more independent around the house and he’d say he would think about it, something that Rey considered progress, or at least better than a NO.

Her friends were not the only ones to comment on her humor. That same night Maz had told her she seemed happier than usual when she visited to have dinner together, but Rey had just told her it had been a good day with a lot of new and interesting patients. It was the same thing she told herself firmly in the bathroom mirror while she prepared to bed. But that wasn’t enough to avoid a very explicit dream involving big hands on her hips, a tongue deep inside her pussy and a _you taste so good, love_ whisper that she could vividly hear just before waking up covered in sweat and that got her pushing two fingers inside her, chasing the orgasm that had built quietly with the help of her subconscious. _Ben_ , she thinks, just before falling sleep again.

✨

The first session next day went well enough for Rey. As this was a regular day it wasn’t just Han in the gym space today but three other patients at the same time and she had to divide her attention and teach them different exercises according to their own pathologies. Rio was a short man that, as Han, had suffered a stroke that affected mainly the motor skills of his right upper body but was mostly recovered. Becker had a crass humor and a prosthetic leg that he was still learning how to use. Jyn was a fifty years old woman who had been diagnosed with Parkinson a year ago and came everyday accompanied by her husband, Cassian.

Rey was embarrassed for how fast she had said hello to the Solo-Organa trio before turning around and moving to correct Rio on something he was doing right.

“Are you ok?” he had asked. “You look very red.”

“Of course I’m ok!” she certainly couldn’t tell Mister Durant she could not look at the face of his new patient companion without remembering her latest orgasm. Nope. She would die first. “Mister Solo, get over here!” she had called.

“I told you to call me Han, kid.” Apparently her guardian angel was looking for her today because he approached with Leia while Ben took a sit on the waiting room and pulled out a book.

As everyone already knew the routine, she focused on Han and Leia and the basics stretching they had to do every day. She regained her focus and the hour passed fast. Before she could realize some people were leaving or changing professionals. Other patients arrived and the day went on. Sometimes she could feel Ben’s eyes on her –she assumed it was Ben as no one had ever made her feel like this before— but every time she looked up his face was buried on his book.

When the time for the Solos to leave was there she had gotten herself under control and could smile and wave goodbye at them. Most important, she has learnt she can survive to Ben’s presence and not combust on the spot, something she had completely doubted that morning. _Success_.

✨

“What do think was wrong with Rey today?” asks Leia on their way home.

“Um?” Ben is trying to focus his eyes on the road and not imagine the therapist’s ass when she’d had to bend over to help a woman with a big ball. “She was probably just busy because of the amount of people in there today.”

“I don’t know, she looked nervous, maybe a bit over energetic?”

“You are imagining things, mom.” His favorite moment today though, as much as he had enjoyed the fit of the pants, _you are such a creep, Solo_ , was when she sat in front of his dad and slowly started massaging his hand to get it to open. She had looked serene. He had wanted to feel the brush of her hand against his just to check if it was as soft as he imagined.

“You are probably right,” says his mom from the back.

But his dad, just beside him, has a big smirk on his face.

✨

On Friday things are easier for Rey. Mainly because there had been no new dream to distress her. Han is a little more receptive to her, giving her full answers instead of grunts. And she actually manages to smile directly at Ben. Yes, she had to take her friends small comments about _how radiant she was today what could be the reason_ but even they couldn’t damage the calm that the closing ritual gives her every Friday afternoon.

Everyone has gone to save their table on Takodana’s –she knows closing the metal curtain of the building would be easier with Finn’s help, but she likes to be the last one out of the place after cleaning and organizing her space. She’s doing just that when she finds an expensive looking wrist watch right under a foam roller. On the back of it there’s and _I love you, Leia_ , so she immediately knows is Han’s and puts it in her lost and found box before continuing.

Five minutes later she’s changing the compress container water when there’s an insistent knock on the main door. It’s closed already and her hands are busy so she yells, “You’ll have to wait a bit!” to whoever’s there.

When she opens the heavy door Rey finds herself in front of an embarrassed Ben Solo.

“I’m so, so sorry. I know you are already closed but I had to try in case someone was still here. Han left something really important here today and he just realize it half an hour ago.”

She smiles. “It’s ok! It’s just me right now and I keep the door locked while I do the small stuff to left things ready for Monday. It’s a watch, right?”

“Yes! It was gift mom gave him for their 25th anniversary. He has never lost it before. I don’t know how it happened today.”

“Don’t worry, I found it just a bit ago. Come on in, I’ll go look for it.”

The place is quite big when there’s no more people around, but Ben’s presence seems to shrink everything. She goes to the box and retrieves the watch.

“Thank you, you are a savior,” says Ben, showing her a smile with adorable dimples.

“You are welcome.”

“Umm, are you done here?”

“I… yes. I just need to check that nothing is connected and all the lights are off. Why?”

“Just to ask if you need some help? With the metal curtain I mean, it looks heavy.”

She knows she can do it alone, she has been doing it since forever.

“I could use some help.”

Her mouth is clearly faster than her brain. But he’s wearing a fancy looking short sleeved shirt and his arms look big. Besides, he’s offering and she doesn’t want to hurt his feeling.

“Great then, I’ll help you turning the lights off.” And that’s what he does. They work on silence, directing tiny smiles at each other. Then he’s outside, showing off by lowering the heavy security metal plank with a single arm.

And then they are standing there on the sidewalk, saying nothing, as if hypnotized. Rey breaks from the trance first.

“Thank you,” she says softly, caressing the back of her hand against his.

He looks down as if she has given him a shock and swallows.

“You are very welcome, Rey,” he answers just as softly before saying goodbye and walking in the opposite direction.

Rey can’t erase the smile from her face, but knows she will really never hear the end of this if her friends learn about what just happened, so she takes a deep breath before entering her mom’s bar where everyone is waiting for her. _Nothing happened anyway_ , she lies to herself.

✨

Ben has the suspicion his dad left his watch on the clinic on purpose today, but says absolutely nothing to complain about it when he returns home and hour later with the gadget on his hand. He was wrong. Her hand wasn’t as soft as he’d imagined. _It was softer_.

✨

_His right hand is wrapped around her neck, holding her up against his chest while he thrust merciless inside her pussy. In and out, deeper each time. No one has ever felt as deep as him. His other hand rubs her clit in slow circles, and she whimpers, feeling her orgasm closer and closer with every movement of his hips and fingers. She’s almost standing on her tiptoes, one hand on the edge of her desk and the other around his left wrist. The hand around her throat tightens a little, making it a bit harder to breathe and she swears she sees twinkly lights behind her eyes when Ben says, “You are so good, sweetheart. You can come for me now.”_

It’s the force of the orgasm that wakes Rey up. She throws an arm over her eyes while her breathing calms. It’s feels like her heart is trying to leave her chest. “Well that’s a first,” she says to the dark room. It’s probably a mix of the alcohol and her daring to slightly touch Ben Solo’s hand today, and if that was just from an innocent touch she doesn’t want to imagine what would happen if something else occurred eventually. She has known him for five days and they haven’t even really talked. “I’m absolutely fucked.”

She has one last thought before falling sleep. _God, I wish_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Upped the chapter count by one. I'm pretty sure I'll need that extra one so the next one is not a mess.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Months pass and things change.

Yes, she's back to blushing on Tuesday the next week, but she can see she’s not the only one so gets over it a lot faster.

“Thank you for saving my watch, kid”, says Han Solo in a tone she can’t really decipher.

“Not a problem, now, have you been doing the exercises I told you?”

“He has not,” says Leia Organa.

“Oh, don’t be like that princess, I never tattle on you.”

“That’s because I never postpone the things I have to do, you nerfherder.”

“Oh, sure you do. Don’t you remember Yavin?”

“Stop changing the subject, Solo. You haven’t been doing your homework and you know it.”

“I just didn’t feel like it, Leia. Stop making a big deal out of this.”

It’s like watching a tennis game the way they both banter. Suddenly, there a source of heat next to her.

“That’s enough,” Ben scolds them in a very firm tone, as if they were children. It does some stuff to her. “Rey is a professional and she doesn’t have to listen to your fights, it’s disrespectful.”

They actually look embarrassed.

“That’s ok. I know this road can be bumpy. That you will not always ´feel like´ doing something, but it’s important for you, not for me because it’s not me the one that’s going through this, to do it anyway. If you wait to ‘feel like it’ it’s possible it actually never happens, and without work there will be no positive change. I’m not angry or about to yell at you because of this, I’m just a bit disappointed.”

“You disappointed her, man,” says Rio from the parallels, shaking his head. “We do not do that here.”

“Oh, shut up tiny man,” answers Han.

“Maybe you could walk here and shut me up if you did your homework.”

“Oooh, that was a good one,” says Becker.

“Yes, yes, I get it. I’m sorry, ok?”

“Ok,” says Rey. “To the mats then, we are working on your abs today.”

While they move Ben says softly, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. This was not bad at all compared to some experiences with other patients.”

“That must not be fun.”

“It’s not, but I still love this job.”

“I can tell.”

She blushes at the way he’s looking at her.

“Is he seeing a therapist? A mental one I mean, not me.”

“He was. For like four months, but he hated it and we didn’t really liked to force him to go. So after promising he’d talk to us he stopped going.”

“Mmm. Maybe you should try to find someone else. Or see if Leia would consider going with him? I’m sure this is hitting them hard as a couple.”

“To be honest we should all be going, but I don’t think we are ready to open that can of worms yet.”

“Really?” She truly is curious.

“Really. But I think they are waiting for you right now.”

“What? Oh, you are right!”

“I’ll just go back to my seat and let you work then.” He says before directing her a wink that makes her knees go weak.

✨

“You’ve never told me what you do.”

“Oh. I’m a lawyer. Corporate law is what I’ve done the most, but I also studied a bit of immigration law.”

“Woah. So that explains the suits.”

“What? Oh, I haven’t really worked since I returned to Alderaan. I’m a fulltime personal driver right now. The suits are mostly because I don’t have other clothes with me and I hate shopping.”

“I can imagine that. Well I think they look really good on you.”

“I think scrubs look really good on you too.”

“Rey! Where do I go now?” she hears Becker ask, so she directs a sorry look at Ben and goes to see her patients.

✨

“Wait you didn’t try the donuts?”

“I don’t really have a sweet tooth so no, I just asked if they knew what the people in the clinic liked and they assorted a box.”

“But you have to try them, I’ll feel bad if everyone but you gets to eat.”

“It’s a thank you gift for you and the rest of the team, Rey. Just take it.”

“Thank you. The chocolate ones are my favorites. I think Maz started rewarding me with chocolate donuts after the therapy sessions with my psychologist when she first adopted me, and they still feel like a positive reinforcement.”

“That’s very sweet.”

“Yes, and now you will share a donut with me so you can understand their power.”

“Okay, but just a bite.”

“Yes!” she has won this round and waits for his verdict while he chews.

“They are nice,” he declares after swallowing.

“Just nice?” she insist with incredulity.

“They are great?” he tries again.

“That’s a bit better.”

✨

Every session they have little conversations like that. And Rey feels she’s getting to know him in tiny bites of information. It’s a bit frustrating because just wants to know everything as fast as possible –that has always been her thing— just to scape this limbo of smiles and accidental brushes they’re trapped in.

“You know, you could just drop a pen while you are in front of him and accidentally brush your ass with his—“

“JANNAH!” Yell Finn and Rey at unison.

“I’m just saying. This is like slowest burn ever existed.”

“It is not, we only met like two months ago. Rose and Finn slow burn lasted two years.”

“Please tell me you are not going to make us go through that again. We cannot keep resolving love problems by locking down adults on a closet.”

“I don’t think we have a closet that’s Ben sized,” says Rose. “And I blame Finn for those two years.”

“Yeah I blame me, too. I’m sorry, love.”

“You are forgiven, love.”

“Ugh, you are disgusting,” declares Rey, gaging.

“You only say that because you haven’t found the way to make those naughty dreams come true. Green is not your color, Kanata.”

“I don’t even know if he likes me!”

“He does,” says Finn

“Definitely,” adds his _love_.

“I’ve seen him look at your ass,” that’s Kaydel with the useful information.

“The guy smiles every time you open your mouth, Rey,” finishes Jannah.

“I… are you sure? I feel as if I actually managed to make a new friend and I’m just afraid of ruining it. I haven’t even kissed him and I already know it would hurt so much more than the ugly breakup with the other idiot.”

“Just… think about it. _You are not going to see a positive change if you do nothing_ ,” says Rose, imitating her voice. Rey has nothing to respond to that.

✨

“Leia, this is painful. I know we raised a dumbass but I didn’t know it was to this extension. I swear if he doesn’t ask that girl out, I’ll do it.”

“You are going to let him do things at his own pace. Even if that pace is the one of a snail because he’s your son and I can only see him following your steps. Or did you forget all you did was antagonize me for four years before acknowledging you loved me?”

“It’s not the same. I actually thought you liked Luke—“

“My brother.”

“And would never look at someone like me.”

“I know. But there really is nothing we can do about this.”

“I can annoy him until he gives up.”

“Or you could drive him away. I… Han, I don’t think I could survive that again. We can’t fail him again. Not when Snoke is still calling him every other day.”

“I know, Princess. I know. I think I just would like to see him happy and settled.”

“We can only have hope, nerfherder. That, and have faith that Maz Kanata did not raise an idiot, too.”

✨

“How was living on Mustafar? I spent my childhood on the Jakku desert but I’ve heard Mustafar’s much drier than any other part of the world.”

“It was… very monotonous. Sandy. Boring. As if nothing ever truly happened there. As if nothing could ever grow on that soil.”

“Then why were you there?”

“I don’t think this is the place or time to talk about it,” he tells her softly.

“Where and when, then?” It’s like suddenly every sound on the clinic stops, as if no one was breathing or daring to move.

“What about tomorrow at dinner?”

“Yes.” He hasn’t finished when her answer is out and they both smile.

In a really small voice, Cassian, who has been waiting for Jyn exclaims, “Finally!”

✨

He was ready to ask her out, he really was, but as always she had been a step ahead of him and he had just followed her lead.

He was not wearing a suit today but a pair of black pants and a black shirt topped with a leather jacket. After thinking it through and analyzing all the little details he had been collecting about Rey he’s decided they’d have breakfast for dinner, so she could eat all the sweet stuff she wanted.

She had given him her phone number and address, and at 6 pm on point he was stopping in front of her building. Only a minute later she walked through the door and robbed him of breath and every single living brain cell left in his head. She was wearing a green dress that brushed her knees, yellow flats, a black jacket and her hair falling in soft waves, framing her face.

Ben Solo had never seen a woman as beautiful as Rey Kanata in her scrubs. In a dress she was simply otherworldly.

Rey’s head was full of similar thoughts. Ben Solo was always a sight to behold, but today she was actually afraid she would spontaneously combust just by proximity. Or speak only in moans.

But once again she managed to get herself together, say hi to the men she had been dreaming for two months and say hello as a civilized human.

“You look stunning, Rey.”

“Thank you, you don’t look too bad either.”

“Apparently I had something more than suits on my closet.”

“The jacket specially makes you look very dashing.” There is the blush she loves er _likes_.

“We should get going,” he says opening the passenger door.

“And where are we going?”

”That’s a surprise, sweetheart.” Oh, she liked that.

She realized he really had been paying attention when they arrived to D’qar a place where sweets were served all day long. It was also quite exclusive and expensive. She and her friends usually had a reservation for her birthday, but that was the only day of the year they’d go to D’qar without the crushing weight of guilt.

“Omg, omg, you didn’t.”

“To see you smile like this? Of course I did.”

“But it’s so expensive, you know you don’t need to bring me to this kind of places, right?”

“Rey, just because I’m not working right now it doesn’t meant I didn’t make an absurd amount of money I never used on anything for years. This is nothing. Just a treat for our first date.”

“First date, uh? So you think there’s going to be a second one?”

He is serious in a second, looking at her with the softer look she has ever seen on his face. “And a third, fourth and fifth if it depends on me.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.”

“Can we start then? The sooner we start the better, so I can get my goodnight kiss.”

“You don’t have to wait for me to say goodbye to get a kiss, you know?”

“I don’t?” He is so close to her now. His big hands –those she was obsessed with— now holding her face.

“Definitely no.”

And then he is kissing her. Soft plump lips barely brushing hers, stealing a small sound from her that seems to be the cue he was waiting to deepen the contact. She opens under him like a flower under the sun to receive his tongue –she had also dreamt with that— and brush it with hers, chasing it every time it seems to want to retreat.

When they finally separate both are breathing a bit funny but the tension that’s been growing this two months has stopped boiling to set on a gentler simmer.

The date. The sweets. The conversation. The travel back to her apartment. Rey can’t really remember anything of that. Maybe tomorrow she will have time to focus on the details. All she knows now is that they were kissing outside of D’qar and now they are kissing inside her home.

Her arms are around his neck, her hands tangled on his hair while his own are caressing her back and ass, squeezing softly for a few seconds. She walks him backwards until his legs crash with her small couch and sits. He’s so big that even like that she only has to bend her neck down a little to not break the kiss.

“Sweetheart, you have no idea how many times I imagined this,” he says while moving his mouth to her neck.

Rey moans and rises a leg to settle next to his hip. He gets the message and helps her dragging her dress up so she can do the same with the other. Settled on his lap — _finally_ — she pushes his jacket away from his shoulders.

“That’s better. And you have no idea, Ben,” she murmurs, throwing her arms around his neck again.

His arms wrap around her waist to get her closer and she goes willingly to rest on his chest. It’s so big it reminds her those trashy novels she secretly read on high school with men with half open shirts on the cover and fainting girls in their arms. It always seemed like a super fake reaction from those women but now she wasn’t so sure.

“I never thought I would find someone like you, you know?”

“I’m just me Ben, nothing special.”

“That’s where you are wrong. You think anyone can handle Han Solo and Leia Organa? Because that’s a big no. I´ve seen the way you treat everyone, the way you always know what to say to give hope to others and that’s something that I’ve only seen mom do before. You are so bright, so good,” _he had told her that in a dream, too_ , “You looked at me and saw who I wanted to be. And you liked it and made me want to be better even when all we had done was accidentally brush hands. Trust me, Rey, you are special.”

“I—” When Rey doesn’t know how to handle her overwhelming emotions she diverts the conversation. That’s her technique. The Rey move™. “I dreamed about you the first day we met.”

“Really?” His hands move to her ass again. “What about it?”

“We were here, on my bed,” Rey can feel how hard he is even with his pants on and her panties blocking the way. She starts to move, setting her weight exactly over it and feels him grunt. “My hands were on your hair, just like now.”

“They feel so good there, sweetheart.” She can feel him moving now, thrusting up in sync with her.

“Mmh. But, you were doing something else, you see?”

He feels so good, she has never come only from dry humping someone, but she’s sure that’s about to change.

“You had your head between my legs, your tongue deep inside me.”

“Oh, yes, please, let me do that.”

“Not yet, baby. Please, can you… god, a bit harder, Ben.”

“Anything you want, anything.”

With that he changes the angle, wraps her hair on one of his hand to apply pressure and move her head back. His other arm is around her waist, and now that her back is arched he takes one of the nipples he sees peeking through the thin dress she’s wearing without a bra into his mouth while accelerating his thrusts. The mix of all the sensations brings the release she was waiting. A minute later she feels him tremble and knows he has followed her over the edge. They kiss a little more and then he leaves, taking a part of her tender hearth with him. Knowing that in return he gave her the same. 

✨

Things change again after that night. Now she greets him with a kiss. They have to support the jokes of her friends and patients together but she doesn’t really mind. He doesn’t either.

His father things this was all his doing since the stunt with the watch. Ben doesn’t correct him either and Rey finds the whole thing adorable.

Ben helps her close every Friday afternoon. Once, she even has to run out of the small kitchen because of a loud noise followed by an “ouch”. It’s just her boyfriend trying to sit on a big yoga ball and immediately falling on his ass “It looked so easy this morning, Rey!”

Maz is over the moon. She has known Han Solo forever and imagines his son must have the same heart of his father. The first time they meet she looks deep into his eyes and nods, as if she had found exactly what she was looking for. He tells her he’ll take care of Rey.

Finn and Ben struggle to find balance. Finn used to be _the_ man in Rey’s life and can’t really accept someone else on the position. Rey worries about this, because she loves them both and is not willing to lose anyone for something this stupid. But eventually they bond over the girls need to overshare their sex history while they are close –and usually chewing something with high probabilities of choking them.

Two months after the date Han is standing up and taking his first steps on the parallels. Leia cries and Ben holds each of his girls on his arms, watching proudly.

Two weeks later Han is in a bad mood because he tried to walk in the house and fell, twisting his ankle. Rey just laughs of his impatience and has him rest for a week.

The sex is always great. The first time Ben tells her he loves her she’s sitting on his face and can’t really hear him well. He repeats himself after she drops next to him, trembling. It’s the most romantic experience of her life.

Even with her dream of him bending her over the desk, the clinic is a big No-No for her. Yes, it’s clean, but not clean enough for sex and also _full of cameras, Ben_. _This is only a thing on pornos_.

Four months after the first steps —six after the date, eight since they met— Han is walking on his own with the help of two elbows crutches. Just in time for the Solos 30th wedding anniversary.

✨

Everyone they love is on this party, celebrating them. New —Rio, Jyn and Cassian, Becker, Finn, Rose, Jannah and Kaydel— and old —Ackbar, Amilyn, Lando, Mon, Cee, Maz— friends, their family —Luke, Ben and Rey— and others they have met across more than 30 exciting years.

“Can you believe we actually managed to stay together all this time?”

“It wasn’t always a party, that’s for sure, princess.”

Leia looks at the spot where their son Rey are dancing.

“But we did well.”

He looks at the same spot and smirks, “Yes we did. Even if it was hard. Even when we got it wrong. I just hope they get going with the grandchildren soon.”

“I love you, Han Solo.”

“I know.”

✨

“I’m so glad to be here right now, you know?” He whispers.

“I’m glad you are here, too.”

He takes a deep breath. “Even if it makes me a really shitty person? It took my dad to almost die for me to return even when I knew my life wasn’t good. That I was only doing damage because I didn’t have the nerve to step up for myself.”

“Hey,” she rises over his naked chest. His _very nice_ naked chest. “I think you underestimate how many times humans need something huge to happen to change our ways. Maybe it was the universe way to giving you and your family a hard reset. It worked, right? You are back. You have tried to make things better—“

“But I still have moments where I resent them so much. I’m a 29 years old man that still feels left out when his parents are sharing a nice moment and wants to shatter it.”

“But you don’t do it. You don’t. And that’s the important thing.”

“I’m so afraid sometimes, Rey.” His eyes close and his arms wrap around her completely.

She lays down over him again, listening to his heart. “About what?”

“About all of this being a dream I’ll be forced to wake up eventually, just to find myself back in a hell built by my own hands. Never having my family back. Never having you. Or having you and losing you because what the hell do I know about love?”

“You don’t have to be afraid of that,” she says with determination. “You know why? Because that would mean that I wouldn’t get to have you either, or that I would let you just push me away and do nothing about it. And that’s unacceptable because _I_ deserve to have all I want. You won’t be able to get rid of me that easily, Ben Solo.”

He finally laughs. “And what could you do about it, uh?”

“I could fight you,” she says, rising over his chest again, straddling his hips. “I know I can take you.”

“A slip of a thing like you? Please.” His hands settle on her hips, which have started moving slowly, to add pressure over his hard on.

Rey leans forward and whispers on his ear, “Oh, but I have a secret. I know exactly what makes you weak,” she bites his earlobe. “All I have to do is find the right moment to attack while your defenses are inexistent.” She licks his neck and he knows he already lost. “Then you’ll be mine.”

“Mmh, that sounds nice,” he stops the movement of her hips to line his erection on her entry and push inside on a single stroke. “But, baby, I already am.”

They lock eyes as they move together. They are both losers and winners of this battle.

✨

It’s not that their patients never miss their sessions. Of course they do. Things come up that get in the middle of people plans every day. It happens even in the team. When Rose’s sister died they called everyone and closed the clinic for a week to keep their friend company. That time there was a nasty stomach bug going around Jannah and Finn were out for a couple days. Rey takes a day off every trimester to company Maz to her checkups. 

But Han, Leia and Ben have never missed before. They aren’t even late, ever. Leia missing a couple times when she had unpostponable meetings? Yes. Ben when he had to travel to Mustafar because of his ugly ex—boss? Yes. But never Han. And Ben would have told her if they had something to do today when they facetimed the night before. But all he had said was _see you tomorrow, sweetheart._

Something about this doesn’t sit right with Rey. She’s jumpy all morning, turning around every time the doors open, but it’s never the Solos. The jokes of Becker only bring the mock of a smile to her face. And Jyn tries distracting her without much success. It’s Kaydel the one who finally snaps and tells her, “Why don’t you just call your boyfriend?”

Rey blushes. Yes, he’s her boyfriend. But that feels like such a wrong word for what he really means to her.

“I’m working. It’s not correct.”

“Babe, we love you. We _know_ you. This is not about you missing a boy. It’s about how you are so worried you didn’t even reacted to Jyn’s super cute puppy pictures.”

They are right and she knows she won’t be able to focus if she doesn’t do anything about this. So she tries to call, but she only reaches his voicemail.

Half an hour later Finn walks out his office looking really pale.

“Rey,” she knows what’s coming its bad because there’s no smile in his voice. “I was watching the news just now and they mentioned Senator Organa. Rey, they are back on the hospital, apparently Han had another stroke this morning.”

✨

Ben can’t believe they are back in this place. Things on his life were finally okay. He’s in love with a brilliant girl who seems to loves him just as much for some mysterious reason. His relationship with Han and Leia is better than ever. Just the night before they had dinner with Luke and Lando and nobody tried to murder each other. They were supposed to be with Rey right now. Joking with Jyn, Rio and Becker. Doing weird sounds with Rose. Using a fake plane board with Finn. Not in the hospital, scared and with no news.

“No news are good news,” repeats Leia like a mantra. But Ben is not so sure.

It was all so sudden. His mother screaming for help because she had woken up to Han on the floor, choking on his own spit. Ben had put him back on the bed but he hadn’t felt his dad respond in any way. In the chaos of the ambulance and fear he hadn’t even picked his phone.

“This is my fault. I should have returned before and maybe none of this would have happened.”

Leia puts a hand on his shoulder to stop him from tearing out his hair.

“Oh, my boy. He’s proud of you. So proud. Even when he hated you were working for that man, Han would still watch the trials and drink in celebration every time you won.”

“What?”

“Ben, your dad and I, we did a lot of wrongs, but you never stopped being the most important thing in our lives. And neither of us blame you for following your own path.”

Amilyn arrives then, and the minute his mom sees her face she starts crying. “I’m so sorry my friend, but I don’t have good news this time.”

“That bad?” Whispers Ben, he’s afraid of breaking is he talks any louder.

“The stroke was bigger this time, affected more than one cerebral artery and is located in a different area than the previous one. There’s no sing of brain activity right now. Only his autonomic system is working and we don’t know how much that is going to last. It could be years, but it could also be minutes. You should go see him. I’m sorry.”

“Oh, Han,” cries his mom.

“We’ll go see him, thanks Amilyn.” The old family friend looks in the brink of tears as well. 

When they enter the white room his dad looks small, but his mother seems to be drinking every detail, completely composed.

“I love you, dad,” says Ben, choking. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that so often. Thanks for the watch thing and always trying to give me the push in the right way, even if I refused to listen. I certainly got my stubbornness from you.”

“I know you are stubborn, nerfherder, but I want you to know… you can leave. I’ll catch you later, my love. We are ok. You can rest now, I promise.”

“I won’t leave her alone. And I’ll bother her constantly, just like you did. I promise, too.”

They stay silent after that, just keeping him company.

Han Solo dies at 4.15 pm on a Friday.

When Ben leaves the room Rey is there, waiting to hold him together while his world falls apart one more time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Han dying was in my outline since the beginning, hence the death tag. I struggled in deciding in what part to end this chapter. But I'm mostly happy with it. I have no beta or time to revise this right now, so I'll do a pass checking for mistakes tomorrow. I do have a HEA planned, we just needed the suffering first.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are you ready?” he asks, extending his hand.
> 
> “Yes,” answers Rey, taking it without vacillation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who were following the story since the beginning: The previous 3 chapters were edited for typos and other errors and I ended up adding around 500 more words to the fic in general. It's now on its best shape in case you want to return and read again :)
> 
> Here's some fluff to repay the sadness of the previous one, thank you for reading!

The funeral is a more intimate event than the anniversary party. Just the closest people and family reunited to remember the man that stole Leia Organa’s heart with constant arguments and bad flirting.

“Oh, but do you remember that time he faced a group of drunks that wanted to hit me for daring to talk with Elle by running, waiving his hands and screaming at them? He was crazy, but the most important thing is that it worked!” Lando knows how to tell a story.

“They stopped running away eventually,” adds Leia.

“And returned to kick our asses. Still, no one but Han Solo could have pulled that off.” He raises his glass in a toast.

Ben laughs with the rest of the people reunited on his house, feeling the love everyone has for his old man. Rey puts her head on his shoulder and looks around with a smile, too.

He’s content right now. Not happy, of course not, but grateful for the time he got to spend with Han these last months, the redemption he has found on their reconciliation. Warm from the person that sits behind him and hasn’t really moved from his side on the last two days. Calm, because he can see his mother surrounded by so many who really worry about her, and not only the power she holds.

“You know he once told me ‘He’s a good one, kid, just have some patience with him’?” asks Rey.

“He did?”

“Yes. I just laughed awkwardly, but it gave me some hope you’d eventually ask me out.”

“I told you I had planned to do that, you just anticipated my move!”

“You can keep telling yourself that.”

He kisses her forehead. “Whatever you say, sweetheart.”

“Oh, I remember that time we managed to fly in the middle of a storm and land on a deserted island because we’d been drinking and hearing some locals on Ach-to talking about a hidden treasure and decided we could get it and sponsor that project from Leia that had just been rejected.” Luke smiles warmly. “All we got was a cold and a sore back from sleeping on the sits until the weather got better.”

“It’s actually a shock he managed to get to his old age with the stunts he was constantly pulling,” says Amilyn.

“He said he always experienced life at the limit so he’d never have regrets.” Chewie, his father oldest friend had arrived the day before and cried with Leia for over an hour in the library. The big hairy man had crushed Ben in a hug similar to those he got when he was a kid. “He never really acknowledged the fact that most of the wildest story involved a ton whisky.”

The small bits of sharing and celebrating his life continue for hours. Ben’s sure this is exactly what his father would have wanted.

✨

It’s always hard when a patient dies. They can do everything in their power to help someone, and most of the time people pulls through, but they know not making it is always a possibility.

When Rey returns to work five days after Han’s death the place doesn’t seems the same. Breakfast is a quiet business where her friends assure her she can take a few more days, but she thinks Ben and Leia need some time alone to sort their feelings and grieve, just the two of them, right now.

Rey knows healing is not linear, that it will take time for things to feel normal for the small family, but she will join them and help for as long as they allow her. When 8.30 arrives she puts on her best smile to receive their patients. Yesterday she spend the day hearing stories of Han Solo and knows he wouldn’t like to see them sad. Life moves on, and they must do it too, even when it’s bittersweet.

✨

“It was weird having the house for ourselves today. Mom and I went through some of his stuff and separated things for storage and to give away. I’ll bring some of them to the clinic in case some of your patients need it.”

“Thank you, love.”

“I think it will take us all of tomorrow to finish, but I should be able to go help you close the place on Friday.”

“I’ll be counting the hours, then. I miss you. I love you.” She had wanted someone to tell her they loved her when her parents died. Maz did, but at the beginning it didn’t felt real.

“I miss you too, almost didn’t sleep last night because I kept reaching for you on the bed.”

“Ah, you got a bad habit only on a couple days!”

“Hard disagree on the bad part of that statement but yes.”

“We’ll be together again soon,” a yawn escapes her.

“You are exhausted, turn off that light and go to sleep, baby.”

“Can you stay on the video call?”

“Yeah.” He settles on his bed and turns off his side bed light and she does the same, propping her phone on a pillow.

“My bed feels weird too,” she says with a sleepy slur, her eyes losing the battle already.

“I know love, goodnight. Remember to charge your phone tomorrow,” he whispers and she falls sleep a second later.

✨

That Friday he takes the wheelchair, some special cushions, the crutches and some adaptation bars to the clinic. They haven’t seen each other in three days and Rey jumps on his arms the minute she is able.

“Cameras, remember?” he says to her with a smile when she refuses to disentangle her legs from his hips.

“Ugh, you are right,” she gets on her feet. “I’m done already, can we leave?”

Her impatience makes him really laugh for the first time since the funeral. “And where exactly are you so desperate to get?”

She directs him a coy smile. “Anywhere my knees won’t hate me if you fuck me?”

“Let’s go.” He takes her hand to pull her out of the place and closes the curtain faster than ever.

In the car she keeps teasing him, bracing her hand on his tight and moving it a bit higher every time they past a traffic light post.

“Rey.”

“What? I’m just here on my seat, doing nothing,” she says while fluttering her eyelashes.

“You know I’ll get payback from this, right?”

“I’m counting on it.”

✨

She does gets on her knees, but over the bed where the comforter is soft and it can’t hurt her. Is it normal that she’s so thirsty for her boyfriend who is clearly grieving? To miss the feeling of him inside her, filling her to the brim, so badly? It’s been like a week only, but she blames Ben who got her used to regular orgasms even during her crappy periods.

She also thinks Ben needs this as much as her, his hands are currently clutching her naked hips as if they were an anchor to earth, his dick stays inside for long minutes where he caress her spine vertebrae by vertebrae and brushes his finger on the rim of her ass before leaving her entirely, which makes her squirm and beg for him until he slams inside her again, just to repeat the cycle. He’s not even working for his orgasm, he’s reveling on the miracle that it’s their bodies together.

She loves it. Loves how he’s using her for this.

But eventually is too much, almost an hour has passed since this torture began, she went from supporting her weight on her hands to her elbows to just let her shoulders fall on the bed, and Rey’s pussy is dropping juices, swollen, desperate to just keep him inside. Ben finally snaps out of it when her whimpers get too loud, moving one hand –she’s sure she going to have twin imprints on her skin tomorrow— to circle her clit, and she sobs.

“I’m sorry baby, I’ll make it better,” he says, now focusing on finding the right angle to hit that spot inside of her that makes her go wild.

“It’s fine, so good.” Her breathing is hard. “Just… please just keep going. Don’t stop.”

“Never, I want you to come for me. _So beautiful_. I want to come inside you. But you first, Rey.”

There’s no fight left in her. She doesn’t know how she hasn’t melt on the bed yet. After half a year together Ben knows how to read her body as if it was one of his favorite books, and it’s only two minutes before the tightening begins just at the top of her stomach, and starts traveling through her muscles until she comes with a cry.

Ben’s immediately out of her but before she can even protest she’s on her back and he’s balls deep inside her again while he lets a rain of kisses fall on her face, her neck, her breast, never interrupting his thrusts. She makes the effort to raise her hands to his hair and bring him closer to her lips. They kiss, wet and long, and after he comes he buries his head on his neck, resting his full body weight on her. Someone could think this is uncomfortable, but she only feels save and protected. Nothing can get to her with Ben between her and the world.

_How is it possible that a person she didn’t know a year ago has now become one of the most important parts of her life?_

Eventually he moves, goes to the bathroom and brings a warm towel to carefully clean them. When he returns to the bed he lays on his side and she cuddles him, her back to his chest an arm under her head and the other laying across het stomach. She knows she needs to pee after sex, but doesn’t want to move.

“Did I hurt you? Was that too much?” he asks.

“No! No. It was good… exactly what I need it,” she exhales with profound satisfaction.

“That’s good,” he says softly. “Thank you. For this. For the days at my house. For the help with the old man.” His voice trembles. “I don’t think things would have been the same without you in our lives.”

“It was my pleasure, love. My life wouldn’t be the same without you either, you know?”

“I guess we were lucky, finding each other when we did.”

“It’s scary to think how easy it would have been for our paths to never cross.”

“I would have found you anyway, I’m sure of that. In any life. In any world.”

“Even in the parallel universe where I probably have green skin and a very bad smell?”

“Even in the one we are mortal enemies.”

“You pinky promise?”

“I do.”

✨

“Ben, I’ve been back to work for a month. I spend most of the day out on meetings and all you do is stay in an empty house.”

“I’m… thinking. And putting stuff in order.”

“There’s no need for order here! Go be with you girlfriend! Give me and Maz some grandchildren!”

“Mom, you know no one is going to hire me here, not after leaving Snoke and calling him an ugly fucking bastard the last time I went to Mustafar.”

“You haven’t asked me.”

“What?”

“You are a damn good lawyer, maybe it’s time for you to use those skills in correcting the damage that some politics have done to the more needed people.”

“I… would like that.”

“Okay then. I’ll have something for you on Monday.”

“Are they going to hate me for getting a position based on nepotism?”

“Sweetheart, nobody in my team is stupid enough to reject a lawyer with your track record. Don’t worry about that.”

He smiles and takes a deep breath before talking again. “I promised him.”

“What?”

“That I wouldn’t let you alone. I promised.”

“Oh, Ben. I know you won’t let me alone. I also now this is not the place you’ll be at your happiest when so many memories are not great. If you tell me it is I won’t say anything more. This is your house, but I get the feeling that it’s not the _home_ for you and Rey.”

“This place is too big for you to stay here alone. I also haven’t talked to Rey about this, mom.”

“I won’t be alone. I’m thinking of moving part of my staff here. The place is big, we can settle a couple offices on the ground floor, make sure the space is useful.”

“Are you sure? Is not going to bother you to share this with strangers?”

She caress his face. “They are not strangers. And some new blood would do this place good. Han would agree.”

“Ok, queen of creepy vampires.”

“Funny. Go find a place to live. I’m kicking you out.”

He laughs and hugs her before leaving the house.

✨

It’s the middle of December, they are cuddling on their new couch, surrounded by a mountain of Christmas decorations and looking at Rey’s laptop after a hard day of work moving boxes and furniture.

When Ben told her his mom kicked him out she had laughed and immediately offered him a place in her apartment, but after just a couple weeks living together they had decided they would need more space than a one bedroom. And now they are here, in their new place, surrounded by both of their stuff. A picture on the clinic were everyone’s laughing and not looking at the camera is currently the center piece on top of the fireplace.

“It’s adorable, Ben.”

“Rey, we are still moving in, we don’t have the time or energy to raise a puppy right now.”

“But look at him! He’s so brown and white, he looks like he’s wearing a tuxedo!”

“A corgi is not even a dog you can run with.”

“His eyes are looking straight to my soul.”

“That’s not possible, this is a picture.”

“I promise I’ll make him take baths. And buy his food. And walk him and clean after him. Please, daddy?” Ben chokes on his beer at that last statement.

“What?!”

“I’m just playing, it’s what children used to say in this situation on sitcoms. Why? Did you liked it? Did it make you all hot and bothered?” she asks, blushing but with an interested gleam in her eyes.

“I— it’s not the right time for a dog right now, ok? Maybe when we are more settled?”

She knows he avoided her question –her patented move— and that he’s right about the puppy thing, but Rey still gives him her saddest eyes when she says, “Okay.”

She knows his weakness, she’ll get that puppy before Valentines.

✨

On Christmas morning he leaves her sleeping on their bed to run a late errand. The shelter owner accepted to open early today just for him to get the puppy Rey had wanted. The little shit really is adorable.

Fifteen minutes later he’s got a big gift box on the back of his car, a puppy as copilot, and a bunch of toys and random shit for him in the trunk. Ben decides to leave the stuff and just take the puppy and the box for now.

The concierge laughs and runs to open the door when he sees him struggling.

“Merry Christmas, sir!”

“Thank you, Arthur. Merry Christmas to you, too!”

Before opening the door he puts the puppy in the box and tells him, “Now stay quiet for a few minutes and I’ll give you a new mom.” The dog just pants and licks his finger.

The top of the box has holes so the dog can breathe. Ben opens and enters quietly, leaves the box under the tree and goes to turn on the kettle. Rey walks out the hallway a couple of minutes later, complaining, “Why did you leave the bed?”

“It’s our first Christmas together, I wanted to make breakfast for you.”

She hugs him and laughs, “You always make breakfast for me.”

“Mmm, that’s because I really love not to be food poisoned.”

“Oi! It was one time!”

“Three.”

“Whatever. I wanted to spend Christmas morning in bed.” Her hands lower to squeeze his ass. He loves where her mind is going, but there’s a dog on a box.

“I have a surprise for you that can’t be given on bed.”

Rey thinks _this_ is the moment. He will get on one knee and ask her to marry him. She’s ready to say yes, giddy with excitement. But he doesn’t ask. He kisses her forehead and sends her to look under the tree.

Her disappointment disappears the second she hears the box _whining_.

“You didn’t!” The top is off and small dark eyes and pointy ears are all she can see. “Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!”

“You like it?”

“BEN I LOVE HIM. HE’S THE MOST PRECIOUS THING THAT HAS EVER EXISTED ON EARTH.”

“Woah, okay.” He walks to where she’s sitting on the floor with the puppy in her arms carrying two cups of tea.

“What’s your name, baby? What’s your name, uh?” She’s doing a baby voice now. Ben already has regrets.

“He doesn’t have any, you’ll have to give him one and we will go update his vet registration during the week.”

“I want him to be Baby because he’s the most precious baby!”

“I will not have a dog named baby. I refuse. He could be something cool like Terminator or T-Rex.”

Rey pouts. “What about BeeBee?”

Ben grunts. “BeeBee?”

“That’s not baby, you can imagine he’s a robot of something!” She scrunches her nose at him.

“Ugh, you are cute and you know it. Fine, he’s BeeBee.”

“You heard that baby? Daddy says your name is BeeBee.” She hasn’t stopped looking at the dog since she pulled him out of the box, so Ben resigns himself to sit on floor to be close to them.

It’s certainly a Christmas morning to remember to the small new family.

✨

The classic Cessna 172 is on peak condition. His dad made sure of that, and even with the forced landing of that dreadful day the small plane is ready to fly. Of course Han Solo’s only son can fly. He got his license when he was eighteen and even when he doesn’t get to fly that often Ben always makes sure to keep the minimum flying hours needed so it’s not revoked.

It makes him feel closer to his dad, being here today.

He has everything planned. Grandma Padmé’s ring is on his pocket. Finn and the girls are in charge of organizing the celebration –Ben hadn’t wanted to jinx it but they’d convinced him there was no way Rey would say no— and then Leia and Maz had gotten involved and Ben had checked out after asking them to _please control yourselves at least a bit_.

It’s early enough for the sun not to be up yet when Rey arrives to the hangar, almost jumpy from the excitement.

“Stay calm, sweetheart. We’ll be flying in a bit.”

She clutches his shirt. “I’ve never done this before! And now I have a cute boyfriend who is a pilot and has a plane! Maybe I should have brought BeeBee.”

“The dog is fine with Finn and Rose.”

“I know, I just missed him last night.” Her hair is in a French braid, she’s no wearing makeup –that he can tell, but he’s a man so what does he know— and looks absolutely stunning. And when they are over the clouds and watching the sunrise he will ask her to be his wife and officially share her life with him. Ben cannot wait.

“Mister Solo,” comes a voice from the hangar. “Everything is ready for you.”

He looks at Rey Kanata standing by his side. He can feel his dad in this place, and remember him teaching about the right controls and how the best part of flying was sharing the experience with the people he loved. Like he loved Ben even in his darkest moments. And Rey in the months he got to know her.

Ben Solo looks around and knows in his heart that everything is going to be just fine.

“Are you ready?” he asks, extending his hand.

“Yes,” answers Rey, taking it without vacillation. She’ll always take his hand. They never have to be alone or afraid again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you got here I hope you at least enjoyed it a little. The fic was born with the line of Han's time of death and exploded from there. It was a very personal one.
> 
> I'm on twitter @mrealidadetinta, where I rt art, speak in spanish, share chaotic random stuff and comment on other people fics but NEVER promote mines as it's not a 100% fandom account and i don't want to pass through the awkwardness of explaining the explicit sex writing to my family or colleagues on there ;)

**Author's Note:**

> This is loosely based on my real life job. I'm aiming to finish in 3, max 4 chapters and finish this soonish.
> 
> This one is for me, who woke up at 4 am, wrote a full outline and went back to sleep like a rock.
> 
> Unbeta'd. Any mistakes are mine and mine only. I'll be updating the tags if needed. Just tell me if you'd like me to add anything.


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